Posted by Ginger Moreno on November 04, 1998 at 09:35:10:
In Reply to: Re: Re: Re: "Carting Ginger Off..." posted by Mili on November 04, 1998 at 03:55:30:
Mili, It appears you did not read my posting properly and therefore answered things which were non-existent. Since the beginning of 1998 I do not believe I have hurt you in any way. What you perceive is not what actually took place. Neither my brother Frank, our cousin Carl, Jr., or myself have demonstrated any antagonistic behavior towards you or your family.
My mother wrote you, yes. However, if she "spoke ill will about me" then I would understand. You see Mili, there is so much more there than you will ever know. My brother and I are both painfully aware of what transpires in this family. The strange part in all of this is that my mother did not put you on the top of the pedestal either! But you were so good to her! Now, I wonder why that was?
Yes, my mother was lonely. The whole thing was extremly sad. She wanted to live with Frank since Frank graduated from college. This was her dream. A dream that is being fulfilled in death because she is at Frank's house. Her life was always dysfunctional and Frank and I realized that at a very young age. My step-father Frank brought happiness and organization to her life, alas, he only lived for 4 short years after they were married. The death of my stepfather was a huge blow for her and, honestly, I do not think she ever recovered. Why? She did not have the coping skills required to recover.
As for Titi Rafa - well Mili, our aunt told me she had met you several times (when you were young) and she remembered all of Eduardo's children.
I read my posting, and it seems to me I never "denounced" your parents. However, I am sure there are factions of the family that probably do (in private, of course). As I said before, I never knew about your plight as a child until you wrote it in your posting. It must have been a horrible time in your life, and I definitely wish you would not have had to go through this.
You were very sarcastic about my brother's writings. Mili, you have no idea of how gifted this man is. If there are more gifted writers in the Arreche clan, well, how wonderful! However, the gift Frank has for, not only informal writing, but for poetry, for lyrics (which have appeared in movies already), for just plain everyday sayings is one to behold. Yes, I am humbled by his craft. I do believe we all are.
Yes, I realize you came to meet Frank and me and my family. However, you also told me that you were coming to see Hadidjah and her daughter also. We all went to dinner and had a terrific time. I am the first the admit it.
Please remember Mili that to love other people you first have to love and be comfortable with yourself.
: Ginger, it make me God if I knew all the answer now, wouldn't it. I don'k think it's unforunate Ginger, I think I am lucky NOT to have all the answers.
: Listen to yourself. Of course you have your own opinion and so does everyone else dear "Cousin." But hurting other people isn't my style lady. Contrary to you, Frank and Carl Jr. I try to find the good in people.
: Your Mother use to write me "quite often". All of her letters were loving to me. She often spoke of Jesus in her letters. I still have her letters somewhere here. She never spoke ill will about anyone, except you. She adored Frank. If I didn't call her "Titi" Iris, she would feel hurt. So I always referred her to Titi Iris. Your Mother inside herself was a very lonely women. How sad. She use to ask me over and over again in her letters to please call her collect. Of course I never called her collect. I would just call her. I received Christmas Cards from her every Christmas. When she stopped. I wondered and then I would finally find her in Rio Piedras, Puerto Rico.
: As for Carl being judge and jury, he could answer me himself he so wishes to. I DO NOT consider a judge or jury. I have made my share of mistakes and acknowledge them. I don't think I have "HURT" anyone purposely, however, I am direct to and to the point.
: I never met Rafaela. I have spoken to her on the phone a couple of times. I also know she is very lonely. Someday soon, I plan to visit her for the first time. I would like to meet her. I feel so sorry for her, she really has no one.
: As for my "loving" parents, there is NOTHING you or anyone can say. You do not know me well enough, only what I wrote. Which of course is totally true. My father was a very very sick man who was good, kind, and a golden heart. I adored my father and felt truly sorry for him. He felt unloved and abandoned by his family and he was so hurt. He would sit in his wheel chair and cry. I know that Titi Yolanda, Tio Miguel, Tio Nono, Aunt Donna, my uncle Luis(whom I adored when I was a child)really and truly cared for my father and for us. Norma was actually my best friend. I loved Jr. with all my heart and I still do. As for my mother. She was a gifted pianist and because of her wonderful talent put food on the table as she had to go out everyday to struggle for us kids to eat. Since my father was so sick and my mother had to go and work we were put into an orphange, since a crippled man couldn't very well take care of 4 children. Not because we weren't loved. We were very much loved. But we were poor. Very very very poor. Yet, we all turned out good. I never had a formal education. yet, I did myself through college and so did my brother and sister. My older brother was in the Navy and he taught himself to speak 7 languages. So there is nothing to be said about denouncing my "wonderful" parents.
: Emily is not a part of this family, thank God. I should have told Frank what she did to me and she laughed at my clothes and shoes. My mocassins were a joke to her and called them stupid. She laughed at my watch. "Looney tunes". Very malicious. When you and Frank left the room, she kept telling my grandson what to do. Excuse me, but I have a very well behaved grandson who goes to a christian school. I am very proud of him and would jump in front of a truck before anyone hurts him. I think I said that right.!!! Anyhow, she did tell me she was "shacking up with you that night" and there was no room for me. I felt so terrible you haven't any idea. I never stay where I am not welcomed or wanted. I know better so I left.
: I went ot Las Vegas to have fun and my trip to California was FOR YOU AND FRANK, NOT HADIDJAH. I was very happy to see Hadidjah as she IS my 1st cousin and my godmother as well. But I went to SEE YOU and FRANK and I was really excited about it. And if it was 4 hours as you say, well my dear time flies when you are having fun. Which i was!!!
: I am very glad you and Frank are best friends. It should always be this way. My sister and my 2 brothers love me to no end. I love them too. My children ARE my best best friends. They know I adore them.
: I hope this clears the air once and for all. It is so much nicer when people can love one another.
: Mili